Understanding Experiences:

“You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backward. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.” – Steve Jobs, 2005 Stanford commencement speech

On March 10, 2018, I and twenty-five MBA classmates from the University of Texas departed central Cape Town for two days of manual labor and immersive learning in support of Heart Capital Village, a social enterprise dedicated to transforming the lives of the previously disadvantaged through vocational and entrepreneurial programming. What I cynically anticipated would only be manual labor and brief, likely superficial interactions with South African locals, turned out to be a personally transformational experience. It was at Heart Capital I would uncover and embrace one of my passions. It would be a moment now, when looking back, which would allow me to connect the dots.

We arrived on site at Heart Capital in the morning and were greeted by Sarina Spector, a transplant from NYC who had turned a month-long fellowship into a lifelong commitment to the people of South Africa and the mission of Heart Capital (it may have helped that she also fell in love with the son of the Founder). We were first given a tour of the recently completed vocational village and introduced to the live-in Heart Capital team. The village would serve as a place for locals, entrepreneurs and those hoping to give back to stay while contributing to the social ecosystem. We would be the first guests to stay in the village and would be helping with the site’s finishing touches and final setup, which would include greenhouse irrigation, landscaping, painting, and more. I volunteered to run irrigation lines, thinking my tall stature may be of help to the greenhouse team. Truth be told after a half hour of work, I felt I was more of a hinderance than a help. I also questioned if we’d leave Heart Capital having shoveled some dirt and not much else. With that in mind, I reluctantly ventured to my next activity, planting shrubs. After a few minutes of false productivity, I bailed. I thought there must be something more I can do, offer or learn.

After a few minutes of roaming around the grounds, I heard two South African women chatting and laughing. I followed the laughter and ended up in the village’s makeshift kitchen. I walked in and was immediately enveloped with warmth, not from the South African heat, but rather from the generous and welcoming nature of Felicia and Thandi. These two women were immigrants from neighboring Zimbabwe and served as the on-site culinary team. They had begun preparing the evening’s meal for our team. I’d always loved to cook and, truth be told, I felt it was most certainly better than planting shrubs with people I already knew. I jumped into the kitchen almost instinctively and had a potato peeler in hand before they could even attempt to turn me away.

In the following few hours, I learned more about South Africa than I had during the entirety of our trip. I learned both Felicia and Thandi had come to South Africa from Zimbabwe because of the job opportunities. Both were sending money home to family members unable to make it to South Africa. Felicia told me of her aspirations to own and operate her own restaurant and the challenges she would face in doing so as an immigrant. Felicia and Thandi explained one of the primary reasons they lived on-site at Heart Capital was because it was safe. Beyond the gates of the community, violence was rampant. In fact, Felicia’s husband had recently been mugged and beaten.

I also learned the two women had a childish curiosity about my American life. Having never been anywhere but their homes in Zimbabwe and their new residence at Heart Capital, many of the questions I received were based on stereotypes of the US from major motion pictures. I had to tell them we don’t all drive large vehicles, recreationally shoot guns or live in large sorority houses. I fielded these questions in most cases with laughter as I continued to peel potatoes. We swapped recipes and talked shop all while I played a few songs from my most recently curated playlist and they showed me a few of their favorite artists. We danced, we laughed and we joked. So there we were, three very different people from very different parts of the world, brought together by a kitchen and the universal language of food.

The dinner table is a centerpiece for families and communities. The process of cooking is historical and cultural and food truly has an inexplicable way of bringing people together. I look back on the experience in the kitchen with Felicia and Thandi with such joy and gratitude. They helped me discover my passion for supporting communities and youth in need through food and healthy living.

What made this experience so enjoyable? I’ve distilled it down to a few key components I believe apply generally to my personal experiential rubric.

+ Organic

My interaction with Felicia and Thandi wasn’t on our itinerary. In fact, there was no expectation any of our team would help prepare our meals. I have found that I get far more enjoyment from those things I cannot anticipate. It’s possible that is because I am present, existing in these moments with no preconceived expectations about what is about to happen.

+ Genuine

Working in the kitchen is humble work. Everyone is created equal in the kitchen, all working toward the same goal. It creates a safe space where secrets can be shared and trust can be built. There is no room, nor time, for bullshit in the kitchen. There is always far too much to be done. Felicia and Thandi were so open and forthcoming with their personal hardships. I can’t help but think they wouldn’t have felt comfortable sharing in an environment outside the kitchen.

+ Experience vs. outcome oriented

I had no deliverable to prepare, no metrics to measure, no expectations during my time in the kitchen. I was present in the moment soaking in the knowledge and wisdom of two incredibly generous and inspiring women. It was in this case that people were ultimately the experience providers.

“Our name, heart capital, says a lot about us. It embodies our consciousness, compassion and devotion to transform quality of life for the better. We’re about tapping into the bigness and openness of our heart, and hearts around the world. By combining our humanitarian mindset with our enterprising approach, we set ourselves apart by being business-like in a sector that usually isn’t. We are resourceful and resilient in every aspect of our mission because we know first-hand just how tough it is out there. We constantly push the boundaries with bold creativity, to find better ways of doing things. Innovation and ingenuity come easily to us, because we are determined to achieve our goals and we will never, never, never give up. No matter what challenges we face, we have fun because we love what we do. But at the end of the day… it’s about hard work, on the ground, making a real, tangible difference, where it matters most.